Trog, as a film, is probably one of the more lazy and derivative horror films I’ve seen. However, it accomplishes this not by knocking off one genre of horror films, but several all at once, in an effort to turn it into some kind of horror cinema Dagwood. It doesn’t succeed, but it does manage to be entertaining in the attempt, but not in the ways they intended.
The film’s premise is pretty basic. Spelunkers in the UK find a neanderthal (called here a troglodyte) in a cave. After it kills one of their number, they go to the police for help. The police work with a local wildlife biologist (played by Joan Collins in her final role) to get the being out of the caves, where Collins tries to civilize it and study it in a very King Kong-esque fashion. A prominent local business man, who originally tried to deny the being existed because he thought it would stop construction of his new development then antagonizes the monster, releases it, and is killed by it. The monster then goes on a rampage, kills several shopkeepers, and kidnaps a child before being talked down by the doctor, and being killed after releasing the child. Oh, and it’s directed by Freddy Francis, so it all feels very Hammer.
So, Hammer coding with the sets and acting, the doctor is kinda written like the Third Doctor would be in a Unit story (but without the gadgets and Venusian Akido), King Kong and Frankenstein references in the plot, and if Jaws has been written when this came out, the businessman would fit in nicely there. I think that’s bingo.
Adding to the unintentional hilarity is Trog’s makeup – the studio got the top half of one of the Early Humans from 2001, but not the rest, so it’s an ape head and furry piece on the shoulders, and a clearly pasty white British guy underneath. The rest of the cast is fine, but they’re saddled with a very poor script. This is aggravated by Francis deciding to pad out the film by taking an extended sequence from a Ray Harryhausen project and injecting it into the middle of the film with some voiceover.
In short, I’m legitimately shocked this film didn’t end up on MST3K.
Is it bad? Absolutely! Is it watchable? Kinda. Is it unintentionally funny? Definitely! Hopefully, it gets a Rifftrax.
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